I’m looking for my soulmate or Why you’ve already found your one true love you just don’t know it yet
REPOSTED FROM THE TRANS-SCEND BLOG 2016
I cannot tell you how often I’ve heard this or read this. “I’ve found my soulmate,” “He/she is the ONE,” “I wish I could find my soulmate/truelove,” it goes on and on. We, as a society, have this need, this drive, and this all out psychological lust to find our one true love. We find it, we don’t find it or we find it and lose it, or we are so sure that they are the one and then… nope! So why is it they we search for this, why do we look for another, why is this seemingly the one true need in our lives?
Simple, we don’t do it for ourselves. Now I’m not referring to sex here, sex is an entirely different topic though it boils down to a lot of the same things. Here, I’m specifically speaking about the need to love, or more specifically someone to love us. We don’t yearn for a partner because we want to share what we had for lunch that day, we don’t search high and low for someone we can talk to about how we like our food cooked, we search for someone to love us, to understand us, to desire us, but why do we do that?
No, really, why? Why do we spend most of our time looking for someone else? Why are a majority of the things we do, say, think or feel all revolve around the pursuit of finding that “special someone.” Oh and then when we find that person, or think we have then we spend the rest of the time trying to hold on to them while simultaneously pushing them away. You don’t think you do that? Really, you might want to think again.
So, our first focus, why am I looking for someone? Well, I want to spend my life with someone… why? I want someone to hold… why? I want someone to talk to… you get the picture? We spend all this time and energy looking outside of ourselves for something that we could, just as easily, give ourselves. In fact, our whole mission here is to learn to give ourselves exactly that. We come on this planet and immediately begin to feel separate. We feel as if nobody understands us, nobody likes, nobody will love us, there isn’t anyone out there like me, we are all so different. Perhaps we are on the surface but if you break that surface and dive down really deeply within yourself first, you will start to see patterns in your life and those clothes to you that are so similar it’s almost unfathomable.
We are taught that we are not important, that others come before us, that we are selfish or egotistical if we do not put others ahead of ourselves. Really, all this does is tell us how unworthy we are of love and we then turn to searching for it. The love we need is truly buried deep with ourselves. That love, an unconditional love, is the ability to look at all you have done in this lifetime and appreciate it all. All of it, appreciate everything that has gone on, love yourself for everything and then let it all go. The only reason we hang onto things, the only reason we rehash all the things we believe have gone wrong in our lives or wasn’t fair or wasn’t supposed to happen are the exact things that NEEDED to occur so that you could get to this point. Right here, right now, reading this and knowing deep inside that the only one you will ever need, will ever long for, will ever truly be the ONE is you.
Be kind to yourself, you didn’t realize this before. Open up, really open up to all those emotions that you’ve held inside for so long. Let them out, cry, yell, and pace and then appreciate. Appreciate that beautiful body of yours that has helped get you this far. That body that has stored so many emotions and it just needs you to let them go so that you cannot just heal but whole. It deserves love for the simple fact that you chose to do your journey in it because it was perfect for you, nobody else but you.
All of your perceived flaws are not that at all they are the beautiful expression of what you have gone through so far on this journey. Some of them are very much related to our ego or small human. They are the products of our fears, insecurities, phobias and so forth. They are all here just for you, just to love. The more we can learn that love is our true nature, that it is the root cause of our feelings of happiness and bliss. That unconditional love is the destination of our journey they more we can jump those hurdles of fear and find ourselves within ourselves.
You are your own soulmate, you just need to look deep inside and open to the possibility that YOU are the LOVE you’ve been looking for.