Pitfalls of being a White Knight
As you can see in this picture I always wanted to be the knight in shining armor. Or the sheriff, Han Solo or any other dashing hero. I protected people for as long as I could remember. At a young age I was opening doors for women, holding my mom when she cried late at night, sticking up for people at school and so forth and so on. I took this into my adult years and though I didn’t always feel like I lived up to it perpetually attempted to be the “white knight.”
We often talk about the “Divine Masculine” being that man that steps up to protect women, to be kind and loving and never let them hurt or be hurt. It’s the same concept as the “Knight in shining armor” or “the white knight” concept and the two seem to have become interwoven as we open up to the idea of different energies within us all. I lived up those concepts in many of my relationships and when I didn’t I chastised myself for it. Many a picture circulates on Facebook these days with men with long hair and good builds being dubbed as “The Divine Masculine” for all others to model. I wanted to be that, be that type of man until one day I figured out that the type of man that is… is not doing women or anyone else a favor.
My own soul had to recently point out to me that I did exactly that in my last relationship, I lived up to that “idea” of “Divine Masculine” I protected her, I supported her, I took the hits, I shielded her from the world, I maintained her safety at all costs and do you know what that did for her? Kept her from walking her own path. Kept her from doing all the things she needed to do for herself. Kept her from stepping into her own power and demonstrating how she could stand on her own two feet with her own Divine Masculine energy. It then tested me again in a new relationship where I had to learn that the idea of taking care of her was not only preventing her from doing her own journey but was sacrificing myself, my soul to do so.
Just stop and take a look at the pictures that circulate out there about what true Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine are. Take a moment to search your own soul, is it your soul being attracted to that version of it or your human body? Our souls don’t put a concept of a body type on the energy of Divine Masculine, that energy is within all of us. That energy is the energy that says I’m strong enough to allow you to walk on your own. I’m strong enough to love you no matter what you do. I’m strong enough to accomplish what I need to accomplish for me and I’m strong enough to allow you to fall on your own face if that is your path. Divine Masculine is not about protecting someone else, it’s about protecting their right to their journey they way they need it to be.
Divine Feminine rises up within us all to meet our Divine Masculine energy and merge and balance with one another. Divine Feminine is the energy that moves us to nurture from a place of being. It’s our creativity and our sacred connection with all. Divine Masculine moves us in the directions our Divine Feminine is our compass. The two marry one another, they do not look for each other in another being for they are within us all and we must learn to hold them in balance and honor them both.
Our human masculine wants to be the big, tough guy for humanness goes against our soul until we learn to see it for what it is and change it. Human feminine wants to be held and taken care of so that she doesn’t need to venture out alone. These are the polar opposites of the energy we are to hold. Let them go, stop holding them up against humanities standards your soul doesn’t want to see you suffer like that.
Femininity is not to be pushed aside, hidden away and protected so that her creativity, gentleness and nurturing are forever banished from your life. Likewise masculinity doesn’t want to be held to a standard that must push it into straight logic, egoic narcissism and brutality. It wants to be strong in its striving forward to share knowledge, create beauty and growth and honor it’s own soul and that of others while journeying on its path.
The mold is no longer fashioned by human society at large. In fact the idea of the perfect man or the perfect woman has been shattered so many times, in countless ages, societies and cultures that the differences should be celebrated more than they are. Divinity is not human made, the lies that we told about god, creation and how to worship in fear is no longer ours to hold. Open up to the idea that Divinity is the opposite of what we thought to be true as humans. Lift the veils off of what we’ve been told to be and do. Find what resonates deep within the heart and speaks to the soul within you.
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